The resistance factor: I’m willing to bet the farm (even though I don’t own one) that emotional resistance plays a major role in your life and you may not even know it!
Just say the word resistance. Now say it slowly. The word has a heaviness to it. To me it is reminiscent of when I’ve stepped onto a piece of already chewed gum on the street and it sticks to my shoe and I am voraciously attempting to pull it off. No matter what I seem to do, it seems that the gum just wants to stay where it is. There is a resistance because it likes being stuck to the bottom of my shoe. It wants to come home with me.
That is what emotional resistance is like. It will follow you around, stick to you like gum to a shoe sole and create a whole lineup of negative emotions that gradually wear us down. I call this energy ‘The Resistance Factor.‘
The Resistance Factor is quite simply the underlying current that dominates and controls how most of us navigate day to day through life.
So, what is it that most of us resist? For starters, we create resistance to Life itself. Life gives us gifts, free of charge, however we often resist accepting them. What does Life give us? It gives us a whole litany of wonderful goodies like love, beauty, opportunities, change, personal growth and expansion. And yet, we create resistance to many, if not all of those ‘goodies.’
I, for one, spent most of the first decades years of my own life dominated by this energy of resistance. I experienced resistance to love. Why? Fear of rejection, fear of abandonment, unworthiness of experiencing it, to name just a few reasons. The result for me was emotional isolation. That can be a very lonely place to be.
When we are resistant to Life itself, we miss what’s in front of us. The beauty that Life provides for us daily becomes non-existent when we have ‘gum on our shoes.’ All that tugging and pulling and we’ve missed the beautiful people, the relationships, the trees, the flowers, the moments. They whiz on by because we are so preoccupied with crisis after crisis. You wake up one day and you say: I feel like life is passing me by. If you have ever said that, then you are a victim of ‘The Resistance Factor.’
Not only do we miss out on love and beauty when resistance to life is the dominant force in our lives; we miss out on opportunities. I have said and written on many occasions that opportunity doesn’t knock once or twice in a lifetime. It knocks every moment of every day. You just have to be consciously awake to its’ presence. When you live in resistance, it is impossible to hear opportunity knocking on your door.
Then there is resistance to change. This is the number one symptom of ‘The Resistance Factor.’ This symptom has so intrigued me over the years as I’ve grown and expanded personally and as I’ve coached hundreds of people. There is a built-in paradox to change: we say we want it in a positive way; however, when ‘push comes to shove’ we resist what it takes to create it.
Why do we resist change? Because we are creatures of habit, and creatures of habit will repeatedly do what is familiar to them, regardless of the outcome or results.
This is why so many people resist personal growth and expansion. Resistance becomes a habit. It is a lot easier to stay stuck, miss out on love, beauty, opportunity, creativity and expansion than to emotionally let go and see and experience what life really has to offer.
Believe me, I have been there and in some aspects of myself and my life, I still am. I still experience resistance; however, through dedication to positive change, growth and expansion, it plays a much smaller and less significant role in my life than it did five or ten years ago. I am now consciously connected to Life which is the life force within me and all other beings including you.
It can be said that ‘The Resistance Factor’ is an emotional disease that prevents us from living in the crystal clear stream that represents the natural flow of life. Look around you. Look at nature. There is no resistance in nature. Trees and flowers don’t resist Life. In fact, they take advantage of Life and all it has to offer them so they can show off and share their beauty. They do it unconditionally and they do it for us. Observe our pets. There is no resistance to Life where they are concerned. Love, opportunity, creative expansion through play are as natural to them as breathing. That’s why we love having them in our lives. They represent that state of mind which we seek to return to.
I know you’re asking: How do I remove resistance to Life from my life once and for all? The answer is: being open and willing to remove it from your life. I’m smiling as I ask this next question: Are you feeling resistance?
Know that removing resistance to Life and all the wonderful attributes it offers us during and through our human experience is a process. For a very small percentage of us, we can let go and live life in the ‘hands-free’ zone instantaneously. For most of us, however, it requires consistent focus and effort.
Here are some tips that can assist you to eliminate emotional resistance from your life:
Tip #1: Right here, right now, no matter what is or isn’t going on in your life, stop! Stop, and in this moment accept what is. Don’t judge it, criticize it or analyze it. Just accept it! By accepting ‘what is’ allows you to release the resistance and actually opens the space for positive change and opportunity to come in to your life.
Tip #2: Focus on what’s right with your life and what you really want to happen. Stop focusing on what’s wrong! Be willing to give up playing the victim! That only reinforces and perpetuates resistance.
Tip #3: Take an inventory of how resistance is present in your life. Write it down. Resistance is only a symptom of fear, so you will now become aware of what it is you are really afraid of. This is a good thing because you are now shedding light on something that can only exist in darkness.
Tip #4: Become a risk-taker. Now, I’m not suggesting you sign up for sky-diving tomorrow, although you can if you want to. What I am suggesting is to ‘go out on a limb’ emotionally and do something that may be just a bit uncomfortable for you. This is essential if you want to experience quality positive change in your life.
Tip #5: Embrace change. Change is the only constant in Life! Either you flow with it, or you constantly go against the tide. Personally, I found that flowing with change is a lot easier than acting like a salmon going upstream all the time.
Remember, ‘The Resistance Factor’ can only play a role in your life if you give it permission to do so. Like me, you have likely done so unconsciously for many years. Use my tips and see if you achieve some positive results. Let me hear from you. I love hearing good news!
Written by Jon Satin
Jon Satin and Chris Pattay – The Possibility Coaches™
©Possibility Coaches, LLC